Pops and Son Conversations
Join US Air Force Veteran, Presidential Achievement Award Recipient, author, philanthropist, and social media influencer, Rob Malloy, and his son, author and model, Javan Anderson, as they navigate the generation gap with humor and heart.
On this podcast, Rob and Javan tackle a wide range of topics – from life lessons and fatherhood to current events and pop culture – offering a unique blend of old-school wisdom and new-school perspectives. Expect lively debates, unexpected insights, and plenty of laughs along the way.
Tune in to Pops and Son Conversations and discover:
- Candid conversations: Rob and Javan share their honest thoughts and experiences, providing a refreshing take on intergenerational relationships.
- Diverse perspectives: Hear how Rob's traditional values intersect with Javan's modern outlook, creating dynamic and engaging discussions.
- Humor and heart: Enjoy a show that's both entertaining and thought-provoking, leaving you with a smile and something to ponder.
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Pops and Son Conversations
Episode 3: Legacy and Authenticity: A Father-Son Dialogue
What if the legacy you leave is more about authenticity than achieving greatness by someone else's standards? Join us as we explore the profound themes of legacy, greatness, and the pressures that come with them, especially for young black men. We kick off with a heartfelt moment celebrating my son's recent achievements, using it as a springboard to dive into personal stories about perseverance and community building. By drawing inspiration from iconic figures like Mike Tyson, we discuss how actions and reputations forge lasting impacts, all while navigating the unique challenges of setting positive examples for future generations.
The expectations placed upon children with successful parents can be overwhelming, but must they fit the mold of their predecessors? We unpack the intricacies of family legacy, using the examples of Michael Jordan and the offspring of celebrities like Jay-Z and Beyoncé to highlight the importance of allowing children to carve out their own identities. The conversation touches on family businesses and the balance between embracing legacy and pursuing personal fulfillment. We challenge the notion of generational curses by focusing on mentorship and proactive conversations aimed at breaking negative cycles, emphasizing the power of conscious change and authentic living.
The thin line between entitlement and empowerment comes under scrutiny as we address the parenting paradox of providing opportunities while nurturing humility and gratitude. Through candid exchanges, we stress leading by example, showing our kids the value of hard work and diverse life experiences. The episode wraps up with me and my son, Jayven, reflecting on our father-son dynamic, expressing deep gratitude for our listeners' support. Together, we've embarked on a heartfelt journey, and we look forward to continuing these candid and enriching conversations in future episodes.
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All right guys. Welcome to another episode of Pops and Son Conversations. It is your favorite silver fox, Rob Loi, and.
Speaker 2:Son here. Javin and Pops Got a question for you today I got a new topic of discussion. You know I always have them. Okay, right.
Speaker 1:Hey, how you feeling.
Speaker 2:Oh, I'm feeling good. How you feeling? I'm right there.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, you know, I just kind of want to mellow things out. Hey, first of all, congratulations, son on, on your success and building your brand. You know. I just want to make sure that I acknowledge that show you some love. I think that's important because, you know, when you're around someone often, sometimes you don't get a chance to celebrate those smaller victories, and we have to do that with each other.
Speaker 2:Okay, I appreciate that Pops I really do. Yeah, indeed, I appreciate that pops I really do. Yeah, indeed, since I got here, I've been, you know, been trying to do my thing, definitely been trying to do my thing.
Speaker 1:So yeah, that means a lot to hear that. All right, I think that may tie into today's topic.
Speaker 2:Man, what we got today, Today we got the legacy of greatness, so we're talking about generational talents and resources becoming gifts when they pass down.
Speaker 1:Okay, yeah, man, you know, every legacy is different. You know, I remember. You remember, not too long ago, mike Tyson was talking to the young lady in an interview and he's like, I don't care about legacy, legacy means nothing. Yeah, I saw that. But Mike Tyson is a legend. So it's almost like, man, it doesn't matter what you say, bro, you still a legend, right? You still were the youngest heavyweight champion of the world. Like, come on, man.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I don't know why Mike said that.
Speaker 1:That's. That's what we've learned throughout the years. Man, mike is going to be Mike.
Speaker 2:That's right, that's right.
Speaker 1:But yeah. So when we talk about legacy and I like that you partnered legacy of greatness, I know that there can be some legacies that some people may feel like, especially as, as you know, young black men, melanated men, men of color, just simply by still being here and still striving and still being a family person and still building businesses and building your community and still being strong and having a brotherhood and iron sharpening, iron Right, that's legacy, because you could have gave up.
Speaker 2:Yeah, could have, and a lot of brothers do. You know, I think it's so easy for you know, for us, to kind of just fall into into a different ritual where, you know, maybe maybe we doing some crime or doing some some unfavorable things to get by, because we feel like that's what we have to do, we feel like it's the only option for us. That's what we have to do. We feel like it's the only option for us. And then you know, there's a lot of, you know, cultural implications and societal judgment, and so I think a lot of times, once we get fed that through the media, it's kind of like all right, so that's an option.
Speaker 2:Right there, I could go this route, you know I could be, even though we, you know, we have examples of the other side, but it's not as many. You know what I mean. It's when you see the news you're seeing, you know the crime you're seeing, you may be in your neighborhood. You see people pursuing just different routes. So it's not always that that representation is not always there, but definitely a legacy of greatness. It starts with just getting up every day and wanting to be great and wanting to strive towards something greater than yourself and wanting to make an impact and wanting to be that light for other people and that example for other people. So I think, yeah, I think that's super important.
Speaker 2:Like I said, man, it's so easy and I have, you know, I grew up with some friends that were, you know, you know, on a different path, and I've been in situations where I could have gone a different path but, like you said, it's one of them things that's like the legacy is where you are continuing to, you know, to strive, and it's like I made it here. I made it as far as no need to stop. So I'm definitely grateful for that. I'm grateful and I have a, you know, I have a dream where I can extend that feeling, extend this feeling to as many people, as many as my brothers, as I can. You know what I mean. Do you feel like that?
Speaker 1:Yeah, leading by example for me is the formula of legacy, because you have to have some type of guidance, some type of blueprint to follow, and then, of course, you know you. You add your contributions to it, um, for the generations after you. So, for instance, you know my pops, you know, um, my pops is, uh, is in his eighties, early eighties, right, so? So back in his day, I mean, you got to understand that he was like civil rights era, yeah you know what?
Speaker 1:I mean so. So when he looks at the progress of things, it's like maybe he, he didn't, he couldn't fathom what it would look like, you know, in the 20th, 21st century. You wouldn't know, because you got to think about back in those days, man, they did not know what the next year was going to look like, yeah, what the next decade was going to look like. They didn't know. If you know they, they still would have segregation in the community, in the schools. They didn't know if the Jim Crow laws, whatever you know, succumbed. They didn't know, they had no idea. All they knew was, day to day, you're gonna fight for your freedom, and that freedom extends to you, your family and those in your community, your neighbor, yeah, those in the area.
Speaker 1:It's I can't imagine. Honestly, you know, people really take for granted the access that they have. Like, you don't have to. And you know, I know we got our favorite realtor Right, but we don't have to stay in that neighborhood. It's OK to move out and sometimes staying in that same area, that same neighborhood, if that's all that you see, then that's going to be your ceiling.
Speaker 1:So imagine going outside of your comfort zone, going outside of what you're accustomed to and knowing that there is so much more out there that you can receive and so much more out there that you can actually receive and achieve. And so for me, man, that's what really building that legacy looks like. It's going above and beyond the norm. It's doing things that you've never done before so you can have the outcome that you've never had before before. So you can have the outcome that you've never had before. And you being fearless and you being brave is literally going to inspire, encourage and impact others so they can do the same, because you can't do this on your own, anybody. That's legacy. They didn't do it on their own.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:They was. They may have been a spark, they may have been a pioneer, but nobody nobody achieves greatness on your own, because in order to achieve greatness, you have to be impactful.
Speaker 2:That's powerful, that's powerful pop. So let me ask you this. So, all right, so I went out, I built my legacy, I built my greatness. You know I'm on top of the world, I got everything, I'm successful right. So now I have a son and I've done all this work. You know I've been through the grind, I've been through all of the trials and tribulations. You know the financial instability, the poverty, all these different things. So you know, now I have a son and he doesn't have to go through all that because I went through it for him.
Speaker 2:So so, do you think that there's a? Do you think he'll, he'll have to deal with, like a pressure from that? You know, like is my, is my success, the legacy that I, from that you know, like is my, is my success, the legacy that I built, you know, even though you know I did everything so that he wouldn't have to worry about nothing, is there going to be a pressure there for him to maybe to like to reach my success or live up to the legacy, or how would it? How would it affect him? I would think, would think that it should be all good. You know what I mean. You should be good, you should be living a comfortable, nice, comfortable life. I don't think there should be any pressure, but I can see a way. Maybe my feats, my accomplishments, my awards, maybe my son will feel like you know well, what have I done or what, how can I contribute to the legacy? You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, that's a really good point. I think there is some inherited pressure when it comes to the kids and think about you know, we'll go all the way up to the top. Think about Michael Jordan, right? So, michael Jordan, one of the greatest basketball players of my era. He has two sons that I know of.
Speaker 1:Right, people are going to look at his sons and be like, okay, what are you guys doing? The first thing they're going to look at is okay, do you play basketball? Are you any good? Are you going to be better than your dad? Are you the second coming Right? So there's always going to be those pressures and the thing about it is, you know, they may not even love ball, like that Mike love basketball, right. So one of them he may. He may not even be in the sports, maybe more on the academic side. He may be more on the art side, where they may want to be an actor. You know, because michael b jordan is not michael jordan's son, right? I think we had to go through that for a couple of years till we figured it out, right? Yeah, and I'm thinking that michael b jordan made it very definitive that you had to be yeah definitely so.
Speaker 1:Uh, just so we don't have to deal with that. But yeah, I think that there is a pressure that you, you really can't, you really can't. You have to acknowledge it Like you can't negate it. It's going to be a pressure there. There's always going to be expectations, of course, you know, with the expectations of of your name, just your family name, yeah, it's of your name, just your family name. Yeah, it's all outside. Right, to be a Jackson, think about it. Right, the Jackson, all the Jacksons, had to do something. You can't be in music or not be in entertainment, right, you couldn't escape it. So I think that there is that pressure there. But there's a lot of pressure that's put on themselves, like you mentioned. Like, okay, you know, my dad accomplished these things. People are looking at me to accomplish something, even even if it's not the same feat in the same arena. Like I have to be good and renowned at something. Right, it's going to be there.
Speaker 1:But I think that the goal for the parent and the parents is to allow that child to have his own identity. You know, and I think that's tough for a lot of parents when you think about family families of attorneys and families of doctors and family, maybe of law enforcement or actors you know thespians. It's going to be hard for them not to, for that kid not to go in that direction, even if it's, you know, just to see how far you can go. You can't go to college and not go to law school, like, even if you get your degree and all that, okay, cool, at least you did that. You may may not go and practice it, but you better go and get it. So I think that that pressure is always going to be there, but it's important for the parent and that child and those children to establish an identity at the same time. So they have to figure that out.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I agree, I agree with you 100 percent. Figure that out. Yeah, I agree, I agree with you 100%. It's going to take a lot on the parents' part and I'm just kind of I just don't know about the effects, because I could see, you know, I'm sure that some of those megastar, successful celebrities and people you know with the kids like maybe like a um, like a jay-z and beyonce, what's the daughter name? Blue ivy, right, like you definitely, and I know it's a lot of people expecting a lot out of you know, out of their kids.
Speaker 2:But it's like, how do the kids feel? Like, how is it affecting them? Like there's gotta be, you know some, some form of either it's going to push them to be the greatest or it's going to hinder them and they may like withdraw and be like no, I can't do it. It's almost like I got to step up to the plate, type of thing. So it's like if I'm not going to be the greatest, then I'm just going to just kind of like shy out of the limelight, like I don't even want to, because I don't want to deal with that pressure. So I definitely could see the kids just not want to deal with it and it's kind of unfair because you know kids should just be able to be kids and just grow up without all of these you know crazy expectations of them being some type of you know protege or some genius or something like that, being some type of um, you know protege or some genius or something like that. But unfortunately that's just kind of what it is. When you, when you deal with with greatness like that, when you have such a great legacy or you have such a a great um, talent or success, it's kind of hard to avoid it. It's really no way around it. So I think I don't know what celebrity was, but I know a lot of them just kind of just keep their kids out of it completely. You know, like I don't even want to introduce the world to my, to my kids, because I already know what y'all gonna do, y'all gonna be trying to judge them.
Speaker 2:But even outside of this, the celebrity aspect of it, just like in general, you know you got different. You know different people. You know just in the world, like you said, you may be a doctor or a lawyer or something like that, and then it's on the smaller scale, but you still probably have family looking at at the kids like, all right, well, you know what, what are you gonna do? What are you gonna make it yourself? And if they, if they decide to go a different route, like dad's's a doctor, but I want to be an artist, you know, they might even be a terrific artist, which is crazy, because you know the talent is still there, but it doesn't fall in line with the expectation.
Speaker 2:So it's hard, and I know it can be hard on the kids, but I guess the best way to deal with it is just try to try to be. You got to be true to yourself at the end of the day, because if you're doing something that you don't like or you don't really think that is your path or your calling, you're not going to be happy at the end of the day, you know. But it's, it's, I don't know. It's tricky because I feel like you still still should be able to lean on the legacy.
Speaker 2:You know I got the name. I know my parents are talented. They've set all this groundwork they've done you know great things and I should be able to reap the benefits from that without being expected to. You know to go above and beyond or be something great like that. So I think in my situation I would want my son to. I definitely would want him to, you know, to continue the legacy in whichever way he can Like. It doesn't have to be in my same footsteps, but as long as it's a respectable passion and you still keeping the name alive and letting people know this is what it is and what you represent, then I'll be, I'll be cool with that. You know I'll be fine with that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, also, I think, at the end of the day, when you look at things, you, you want to have resources, you know, for your child, so that's, you know, that's one of the main things you want to make sure that they do have resources, even if they go a different direction. Another thing that I'll say and this is something that was important to me, as you know is having some type of family business. To me, as you know, is having some type of family business right, having something, that the name is important, having something for you know your family name, and so I think that's what legacy is all about is, at the end of the day, having something, because when you think about names, people really don't realize how many names that they support on a regular basis.
Speaker 1:Like you know they love wearing Gucci and Versace, like that's a name. You know Mercedes Benz and and you know all the, all these other things that people like, man, those are, those are names. Man, you drinking Welch's juice well, it's a name. Brother, sisters, yeah, end of the day, man, we, we want our name to mean something, and so I think that's what's so extremely important when we start talking about legacy. But you know, jay, actually, uh, kind of pivoting a little bit, man, I think that we should even even just kind of touch on, you know, generational curses, generational blessings. You know people talk about that a lot and they think that it may be because they didn't necessarily fall into a their footsteps. But you know, do you actually believe that a generational curse exists and how do you think that dynamic can can trickle down to to the next generation?
Speaker 2:Well, I look at general curse like this and I know we just kind of recently have been able to identify okay, this is a generational curse, all right. And I've seen so many of those videos online where they're pouring some dirty liquid into the next cup and then they pour it into the next cup until it's clear and they're like all right, this is how you get rid of your generational curses, right? So you basically they're just saying that you have to make changes, just saying that you have to make changes. But I'm not so. I'm not so certain if, if these things are, are a curse. It's more, if it's just like you know some, some traumatic things that that maybe happened to you in your childhood, that you don't, that you don't want to introduce your kid to, and I don't know if that's. You know we call it generational curse here, but I think that should be the natural, the natural flow of things. Now I understand maybe you got really bad beatings or really bad whoopings as a kid and now you know that's translating to your kid and you doing it just because, hey, this is how I was raised. Now is that? I don't, I'm not sure if that's a generational curse or if that's just like yo, that's, you know, some trauma, and you should be able to identify yourself because it's like you didn't like when you were you know, when you were getting these real bad beatings like that. So that should just innately, you know, you should be able be able to say, all right, let me not transfer that type of energy to my kid because I didn't like it. I think this is it could be as simple as that. You know what I mean.
Speaker 2:But when we get to talking about things like um, like an addiction or just greed, or maybe gambling or something like that, like, do we look at those as generational curses? Yeah, and even if we, even if we say those are, I I'm not. So I think the best way to to to avoid something like that is just going to be is just going to be through conversation and just having an open discussion about it. You know, because, just like I said once, once we were able to identify that, okay, this is what this is, this is a generational curse, right, so we identified it. Now we could deal with it. So if you had a conversation with your kid, like, all right, this, this is what's going on, this is why maybe you are, you know, more predisposed to being a gambler. Maybe you have an addictive personality because you know I dealt with that, or your grandfather dealt with that, or your grandma, whatever it is. I think it's just a conversation.
Speaker 2:Once we want to start breaking these curses right, the discussion has to happen first and it has to be identified what it is, because what I've seen, or what I think happens, is it just goes unchecked or it's kind of one of those taboo things. Nobody really wants to talk about it, nobody really. Maybe it's not understood as well and so it just never gets checked and it never gets. It never gets um discussed in the family. And I think something like this has to be a family meeting. It has to be, you know, everybody's included, everybody gets that input, and then you, you move forward and kind of and figure out the steps on how we're going to break this. But definitely number one, it has to start with the identification and then go on to have the discussion on how we're going to rectify, how we're going to deal with it.
Speaker 1:OK, I could definitely see that. I like what you mentioned, questioning if it's actually a curse or not, and I would say that there may be some, some traits, uh, and there may be some habits that need to be broken. Um, curse is is harsh man, that's a hard yeah, I agree um, because it's almost like you have no choice.
Speaker 1:Like you, you're going to be cursed until you deal, uh, till you deal with it. And I think if, if, as a family, like you mentioned, collectively, if we start exercising positive habits, then that would offset some of the things, uh, some of the outcomes that have been unfavorable, uh, long-term. Um, when you talk about repeating, you know negative patterns and you could, we could get into that when it comes to, you know, maybe alcohol or drugs or smoking and things like that, you know, of course kids are going to emulate whatever they see, so so that's always going to play a factor. But if we can just position our generations differently, we can add the things that worked for us. But we also need to be proactive on some things that that weren't, that didn't give us great results. And then we also have to take an accountability that there's new tools to use. Now, right, there's new resources to use.
Speaker 1:One of the stories I'll say real, real quick is I remember I was in Minnesota. I was booked for Minnesota to to be at the hair expo. So shout out to the Twin City Beauty um expo, to the minnesota team out there, um, I I hosted a rooftop um party. It was a you know, the opening to get things going, and there was a handful of ladies down. There was only a few guys, there wasn't enough guys for me, but there was a handful of ladies and you know, we was only a few guys, there weren't enough guys for me, but there was a handful of ladies and you know, we were just talking about, I think one of the ladies talked about her son and played football or she had a. He was on restriction because his grades and things like that. And I started talking to them a little bit about the difference between a role model and a mentor and they looked at me sideways, jay, I thought that I was going to have to catch the next thing smoking on back to the eight.
Speaker 1:I said you know, a role model, of course is, is somebody who kids can look at and it's a positive image. Right, but you don't necessarily, you can't necessarily do everything the role model does, because it may not be something in your, in your arena or something in your spectrum. So you know, a role model could be your dad, you know, or your uncle or your granddad. Role model could be a coach, you know what I mean. You know somebody in the community coach. You know what I mean. Uh, you know somebody in the community, but a mentor. A mentor is completely different in terms of what you're going to get from a mentor. A mentor is going to hold you accountable, yeah, right. A mentor is also someone that has a special, specific set of skills to be able to guide you and direct you.
Speaker 1:And they wasn't feeling me on that. So you know they was like well, my son, his dad is his mentor. I said, well, okay, so what does his dad do? Well, you know he works at a warehouse. He's a supervisor at the warehouse. So what if your son wants to go into IT at the warehouse upgrade? So what if your son wants to go into IT? Can his dad mentor him into the IT industry?
Speaker 1:And when I tell you, I thought she was going to throw something at me. I wasn't trying to be funny, but I was trying to be very, very direct with the approach and show the significance. Now, the thing about it is as his role model, his. It is as his role model. His dad has his role model. His dad can help him with researching and directing him to an IT professional or IT program. That doesn't take away anything as far as his dad not being his mentor in that specific industry.
Speaker 1:And'm gonna tell you, man, I just went ahead and cut the subject off all along. I was like, hey, you know what, every household is different and you know. But but at the same time and I just was blunt I was like for me I didn't really have a mentor I had. My dad was a great role model, know, but I didn't want to go into the Navy. He was a 30 plus or almost 30 year Navy veteran. He knows, breathes, sleeps Navy. I went into the Air Force. So what could he tell me about going into the Air Force, besides your high grade on your ad, fat, right, do the best you can and get in there.
Speaker 1:So I think mentors can be a game changer and in our culture, in our society, that is something that could literally change the trajectory of our generations. Imagine having a mentor. You know, because kids they want to do more than play professional sports or or be an actor, or, you know, be a fire fighter, like what. If they want to do something else, right, you, you have to be able to guide them and direct them to somebody who can not only show them and guide them, but have had a documented success of being in that industry so that you know that they're going the right path. And of course, it's going to take some work, ethic, some effort and some positive activity in the belief system. But for me, man, when you start talking about breaking, uh, any type of generational bad habits and stuff like that, having mentors in place, man, is that's where it's at.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, gotta have that mentor. I agree, like I didn't. The mentor, and you know, honestly, that is is when you that it makes all of the sense in the world. The role model versus the mentor aspect. But I would not have thought about that. Yeah, role models are important, but mentors are just as important. But you don't really hear that as much. You hear who's your role model. Nobody asks you who your mentor is. So I think that's important, just to bring that to the forefront. Like you said, that could change the trajectory of the whole generation if we not only seek out or teach the young men to seek out mentors, but also go ahead and lend our service as mentors ourselves. Like it's nothing, you know, stopping anybody that has the expertise in any field from being a mentor. You know. Just offer that, you know, and it's just going to take, you know, being for the community and being one of those service leaders. That's going to say I want to step up and make a change. That's all it is.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, you know when you think about it. Also, you have to address the entitlement versus the empowerment aspect. You know there's definitely a fine line between providing opportunities and fostering the entitlement. The entitlement, you know, in our kids Like, of course, you empower them right. You empower them by first leading by example, you know, because the kids need to see that you work for it right. They need to see that you're continuing to work for that. You didn't let your foot off the gas when it came to your work ethic and you moving forward in your belief system and you staying positive. And you know, of course there's going to be some ups and downs and obstacles during that journey, but they need to see that you actually work through it. They need that You're not doing it by yourself. How important being a teammate is, how important it is to setting goals and and whether they're small goals, short-term, long-term they actually need to see that process so they can respect that process. So how do you feel about, you know, the entitlement versus the empowerment with those opportunities?
Speaker 2:I definitely think it's a fine line because I could see, especially in today's age, with kids, they just, you know, there's a big entitlement issue and people talk about it. It's one of the discussions that you'll see online. Like, today's kids feel entitled and it's, in part, be just because of the like, the instant gratification that we have today that you, you know, you didn't really have back in the day. Like there's so many ways to just get exactly what you want on demand in today's, in today's age, whether that's. You know, if you want something, you could go and shop online and get it. It'll be at your door the next day. Or if you want something to eat, you could Uber Eats and it shows up. So we've been conditioned. Or kids growing up today are conditioned to you know what I want, I click a button and then I get it, you know. So I could see how, if, if your parent has, you know, laid the groundwork and did everything, and you see that, you know, you, you see what's available to you, yeah, you, you might feel like, yeah, that's mom, I want it now, but there, there. But there's importance in that work, in that grind. So I think that we have to like, for instance I can't remember who it is, but I've actually heard of several different celebrities say, like they don't just give their kids like a blank check, like you still have to work. You know you still have to at least show me that you're able or capable of providing for yourself before I'm just going to.
Speaker 2:You know, enjoying all of these fruits, but you don't understand the real value behind it. You can get reckless. You know you could get reckless. You're not going to appreciate it as much. And then you got to think of the type of person that it makes you right person that it makes you right Because everybody you know in America isn't. You know there's a percentage, only a small percent that is living a life of luxury and able to do all these things right. So if you go and mingle with you know different people that walk different paths, you got to just kind of think of how you represent yourself.
Speaker 2:If you're one of those people that is like, yeah, this is, you know, I get whatever I want, or just used to that instant gratification or that entitlement, you know what I mean. You can't deal with people like that, like people look at you crazy if you're just walking around thinking that this is yours because it is, and you might have lived a life that you got everything you wanted, but that's not most of the world, you know. So it's going to be a reality check. So you definitely have to balance and kind of figure out a way for your kids to still be able to be humble and understand, yeah, understand what's coming to you. Yeah, you deserve it because you're part of the legacy and you know, of course, I want you to continue to bear the name and bring respect to the name this, that and the third, but in that it's also you being a person of humility and able to understand that everybody's walk of life is not the same as yours, so you have to carry yourself a certain type of way, you know.
Speaker 2:So, definitely, providing opportunities is important, but that's a fine line. I think it's a real fine line between, especially today with the entitlement. So I would, I definitely would just instill that like don't just, you know, drop a bag on the kid and then just think that they're gonna grow up to be a perfectly, you know, fine human. Like, no, they're probably gonna be a dirt bag in some instances because they just living like they got all this money and they don't have a care in the world. Now, it shouldn't go like that. But you know, that's that's. That's my opinion, that's what I think about it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's a twofold situation. You have to understand that. The generation, my particular generation, and even if you go back to where you know my parents, you know they, they didn't have a whole lot of access to stuff. So you know, we had to learn. My generation, we had to learn. We're the generation to where you know our parents, a lot of our parents had limited resources and limited knowledge because things was withheld from them. So we are the ones that actually have.
Speaker 1:When you talk about get it out the mud, we had to get it out the mud, right. So we don't necessarily want our children to have to do that. Yeah, we want them to be responsible and accountable, but at the same time, you know, nobody really wants their child to have it that hard. Of course you know it's case by case, but, um, so there's a lot of people in my generation man, the, the, the moms, the dads they spoiled their kids, man, because they didn't have it, and they just want their children to to have a, a uh life and a lifestyle to where you know you didn't have to struggle, didn't have to wonder okay, uh, can I ask for a new pair of shoes, or mama gonna say I can't get it, stop bothering me.
Speaker 1:Uh, get your brother's shoes and hand-me-downs, like we're the generation of the hand-me-downs. You know, I'm, uh, the youngest of four and I tell you what, man, growing up man, sometimes I ain't know if I put on my sister's old jacket or my brother's old jacket. I just put on the jean jacket, and then, of course, I learned that you know, the buttons are different on the right and on the left. And, oh man, I done put my sister's jean jacket on all day long, man Just rocking it.
Speaker 2:That's crazy no.
Speaker 1:So, uh, it's man, it's, it's case by case and it's tough, but I do believe that leading by example is, is always going to be the key because, again, you know, kids, um, they're going to look at what you're doing. They're going to look at how you spend, how you respond. So if you bawling out and you clean and you fresh, they're going to look at how you spend, how you respond. So if you balling out and you clean and you fresh, they're not going to expect anything different than what you do and what you have. And so, a lot of times, you know, people don't have that modest lifestyle or, like you said, even the humble approach. So the kids aren't. The kids are going to follow suit with what they see, and I think that's what we've run into in a lot of different instances, and you know. So you just have to pay attention to how you do and what you do. And you know how the saying goes do as I say, not as I do.
Speaker 2:That's right.
Speaker 1:You know, but that's you know. Kids take stuff literally. Yeah, they hear you, but, okay, they see you too. And I wanted to bring up an example, even in the celebrity world, of a child that had access to everything and was probably guided to do certain things. You remember Willow Smith, Jada and Will, or Will and Jada.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I like Willow.
Speaker 1:Remember when she was a little baby girl, a little cute little girl and stuff, and waving her hair back and forth right, Right After that little music tranche. For a little bit she dipped on them.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:She slid, man, and I think there was an article where she finally talked about it and she was like she didn't want to deal with the pressure of being Will and Jada's both of them being great actors and Will having a music career and having to follow between that and being judged on her success of her music man. She, she dipped.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's a good example.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so now we see her, you know as an adult she's kind of coming back and you know there's no pressure there, of course, because now she understands that number one, I can do this for me now, right, and so she probably did some other ventures and some and explored some other avenues that wasn't music that she could be passionate about and, you know, had some success with that.
Speaker 1:So she can come back and do music as a hobby. I mean, whether you like it or not, she has the resources to be able to do that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, so that's, and that, yeah, yeah, so that's and that's and that's. You know she's able to, to kind of lean on on the legacy, but I definitely feel where she was coming from with the pressure, because that's what I was saying, like it's. You know, it could be a gift and a curse, because you, you just never know, like you want to step up to the plate, but you know the ball coming a little too fast, so it's like, nah, let me just go ahead and head back to the dugout. I ain't even trying to hit right now, man, but it's good that you know that she came back and so that just shows you that there is a way through it and there's a way to, to, to deal with it, you know yeah, yeah, no doubt.
Speaker 1:I mean we can always go through. You know some celebrity cases, uh, I mean, uh, they're not letting diddy rest, right, but just briefly, um, he's created, I mean, because he created a legacy, I mean you can't deny that you know music. I mean he was a mogul right. So, um, and he't deny that you know music, I mean he was a mogul Right, so, and he paved the way for his sons to be able to go in different avenues entertainment, promotion, events, music, acting. So you can't deny his legacy.
Speaker 1:But you know, at the same time, man with the controversy is kind of like, ok, where did what do they do now? Like, do they have to kind of put a lot of projects on hold? Yeah, will it ever die down? Do you wait? So it's just one of those, those tough situations, and you know we can go on. You know Ice Cube's legacy, you know, and his son I think he has two sons, right, but but one it does a little bit more acting yeah, yeah, definitely, yeah, he played him yeah his son played him, so I'm sure when he was dealing with that it was like man he he already knew I gotta, I gotta, come with it.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:So that was definitely some pressure on that and I think he's a better actor than ice cube you think so? Yeah, man. Um, I know that, uh, there's another movie coming out soon, but uh, yeah, and the last movie that he played? Oh, yeah, man, definitely they say.
Speaker 2:They say ice cube is like he played the same person in every movie. He just played Ice Cube.
Speaker 1:Right, right. He always Craig right, wherever he's at.
Speaker 1:That's all he got to do, man Too funny man, let's wrap this thing up, man, but I don't think that we can leave out of here without talking about, you know, some legacies that people may not necessarily acknowledge as much as um actors out here and and and, um, you know, of course you got to mention lebron and brani, right, definitely, definitely.
Speaker 1:But you know, here, being here in atlanta, man, we got, uh, we got willie watkins, which was, uh, if I'm not mistaken, the, the first black owned funeral home service provider. You know, and there's, there's a bunch of Willie Watkins funeral homes all throughout Atlanta and you know people may be like, ok, well, you know, you deal with dead people. I mean, it's, it's an industry and it's a necessity, it's a service that is needed in the community. It's an industry and it's a necessity, it's a service that is needed in the community, right, who else do you want to do with somebody who's not going to care about you? And make sure that you know you have the arrangements that that you desire, you know, for your loved ones and you know. So we got to look at it like that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, see, that topic right there is. That's a whole nother conversation just dealing with, you know, dealing with deaths in the family in our community a lot of times. You know, when we get hit with something like that, we don't know. You know all the time how to deal with it, you know so. But you know we can have that conversation at a at another day. But yeah, I didn't know that about the um, what'd you say? His name was willie, yeah, willie walkins?
Speaker 1:willie walkins, if I'm not mistaken. Willie a walkins, if I'm not. If I'm not mistaken, but yeah, willie walkins. You know, you guys can google him uh, atlanta based uh, but yeah, if I'm, if I'm not mistaken, he actually uh uh took care of the services for uh martin luther king jr okay, okay, okay, okay provided those services for his family.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, shout out to him and his family uh, he has a daughter that also, uh, runs some other family businesses, um, but absolutely, uh, uh, uh, honorable legacy, uh, for that family. So that's definitely something that uh, yeah as a matter of fact, uh, his grandfather, uh, mr Willie Watkins grandfather, uh, was the one that that made the arrangements for um Martin Luther King jr. And now his grandson is actually running things now here in Atlanta.
Speaker 1:So legacy of greatness, legacy of greatness, indeed, indeed. So check it out, man, let's, let's go ahead and wrap this up so we can keep it moving. Guys, we appreciate you rocking with us. Pops and son conversation, conversations. Your favorite silver fox, rob malloy jayven here signing out.
Speaker 2:All right, we gone. Peace.
