Pops and Son Conversations
Join US Air Force Veteran, Presidential Achievement Award Recipient, author, philanthropist, and social media influencer, Rob Malloy, and his son, author and model, Javan Anderson, as they navigate the generation gap with humor and heart.
On this podcast, Rob and Javan tackle a wide range of topics – from life lessons and fatherhood to current events and pop culture – offering a unique blend of old-school wisdom and new-school perspectives. Expect lively debates, unexpected insights, and plenty of laughs along the way.
Tune in to Pops and Son Conversations and discover:
- Candid conversations: Rob and Javan share their honest thoughts and experiences, providing a refreshing take on intergenerational relationships.
- Diverse perspectives: Hear how Rob's traditional values intersect with Javan's modern outlook, creating dynamic and engaging discussions.
- Humor and heart: Enjoy a show that's both entertaining and thought-provoking, leaving you with a smile and something to ponder.
Subscribe now and join the conversation!
Pops and Son Conversations
Father-Son Wisdom on Women's Month
A father and son duo dive deep into what Women's Month truly means beyond just a designated celebration in March. Rob "Silver Fox" Malloy and Javan "Mr. Check Three Times" share personal stories about the influential women who shaped their lives, particularly their mothers whose wisdom continues to guide them decades later.
The conversation takes unexpected turns as they explore authenticity in relationships, with Javin revealing the most valuable advice he's received from women: "always be yourself." This leads to a thought-provoking discussion about reciprocity—how men often try to meet women's expectations while wondering what they receive in return. It's a refreshingly honest take on relationship dynamics rarely heard in mainstream conversations.
What makes this episode particularly powerful is their examination of how men can better support women by creating safe spaces where women can express themselves without judgment. They don't shy away from acknowledging toxic masculinity and the tendency for men to speak over women rather than truly listening. Their vulnerability in discussing these topics provides a blueprint for how men can engage meaningfully in conversations about gender appreciation.
The episode culminates with Rob sharing a remarkable piece of family history—his grandmother was recognized as Rhode Island's first woman welder in the 1930s, highlighting the legacy of female pioneers whose contributions shaped history. This personal connection adds depth and perspective to their celebration of women's impact.
Whether you're interested in intergenerational perspectives, relationship dynamics, or simply how men can be better allies to women, this heartfelt conversation offers wisdom, humor, and actionable insights for appreciating the women in your life—not just during Women's Month, but every day.
Please follow Pops and Son Conversations on the website, popsandsonconversations.com, and social media @popsandsonconversations
Okay, friends and family, welcome to another episode of Pops and Son Conversations. Of course, it is your favorite Silver Fox, Rob Malloy.
Speaker 2:And Son is here, Javin, aka Mr Check Three Times.
Speaker 1:Hey, that's what I'm talking about, man. Hey, shout out to Mr Check three times, man, you have been crushing it. You know, in that spoken word, poetry speaks bespoke. All that stuff, amazing stuff going on because it's a really strong message and people listen, man, I was surprised how people were just shutting their mouths and they was actually listening. And you know the who's and ours through, uh, through the whole, the whole poem, man that's, that's pretty cool yeah, thanks, pop.
Speaker 2:You know, hey, I got some on my hands. I'm about to uh go up with it. Just wait, y'all, just wait. I got something in store for you, I promise oh man, so cool.
Speaker 1:So, look, we're, we're in, uh, the beautiful month of march, which is women's month. I mean, it's always women's month, it's always women's day.
Speaker 2:Let's just oh yeah yeah, let's not just reduce it to one month?
Speaker 1:right, we won't, but we will go the extra mile because it is March and we do appreciate you, ladies. Without you obviously nobody cares about nothing, because that's where all the emotion and sensitivity and all the extra concern and nurturing comes because of women. You know, we're boring man, to be honest with you, Without women, dudes are boring.
Speaker 2:Hey, that's a fact.
Speaker 1:Right, just think about it. You know, and of course, speaking for a man, because I am one, I would rather hang out with my fellas for a short period of time. But man, just knowing I'm going home or meet with my woman and like I don't care how y'all feel about me leaving man, I'm out.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, oh yeah. When it's time to go, it's time to go.
Speaker 1:It's time to go. And of course you, you know, sometimes you need that space from your lady so you can appreciate each other right. But I guarantee you, man, it's nothing like reconnecting with your lady when it's time to reconnect, that's right.
Speaker 1:You just have to have that. You know, you just have to have that space man. That's a whole other conversation. You just have to have that space man. That's a whole other conversation. But much love and respect to all the ladies. We celebrate you every day, but especially Women's Month, march 2025. What direction do you want to go to man when it comes to just talking about how women are so amazing, jay?
Speaker 2:Well, you know, I want to. I think we could, you know, just kind of take a little time to just talk about some women in our life that we appreciate. You know what I mean. Okay, bring that to the forefront. Yeah, you know, as I sit and think, man, you know women have, just, they've been so impactful in my life, in my family. You know so many aunts, of coursets, of course, my mom, grandma, great-grandma, god rest her soul. You know, just like you said, like the nurturing man, the caring, the love. It's nothing like that, that love from a woman, right, they just make you feel so, so good about yourself, like you could go and and just just jump over a mountain to conquer the world man exactly superman, put that cape on your back man you know facts on facts, man for
Speaker 1:real women. Pouring into men is unmatched, um. They have an amazing ability to take little bits and pieces of energy and multiply it Right. You just have to be really consistent in pouring into your woman, to. You know your woman, or the women that are around you. You know your daughter, your sisters, you know those that you care about. All you have to do is just constantly pour into them, you know, um, and and they'll multiply that energy that you, you give them. So that's what makes it amazing, you know, for us, man, you got to pick us all the way up Like we're flat on our face.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and you, you, just you know you got to go get the crane, or the jaws of life as they say, and you got to pick us all the way up, and even still we just kind of lingering and hovering until we get it together, man.
Speaker 2:That's true, man Brother. Be down in the dumps. Man Down in the gutters, bro Down in the gutters.
Speaker 1:But there's nothing like the encouraging words of a woman. You know, just for sincerity, just for honesty, man will, will change your life. Man, I gotta be honest with you. I ain't trying to get too deep, but that's that's really what it is. That's why, you know, some of the most golden moments are with your mother, because you know they care about you and they want to make sure that you know you feel good, but at the same time, man, they have to give you that hardcore truth, because nobody else is going to give it to you like that. Oh, man, yeah, yeah, and so, uh, you know.
Speaker 1:So shout out to my mom, dolores Malloy uh, we, you know, um, she, she's so unique because she's always been tough Like, you know, really tough, Like moms is tough. You know the women are like the tougher ones because you don't expect them you know what I'm saying to give you a right cross. You know, right across that jaw, like that, and you never knew that there that so much power in it. But, nah, on a serious note, she's um, doesn't have to say a whole lot. She's very, um, meticulous with her words and she's very intentional in the messages that she gives you.
Speaker 1:Like, my mom has never like given me a long speech. She's like going to get right straight to it, like, look, you know. First of all, you already know Like this is your lesson. You know, you picked yourself up, you see what the issue is. Now you have to make sure that you take this learning experience and you apply it so you don't do the same dumb things over and over and over, because now it's on you. You know, just something that simple, that kind of lingers with you hours, days, months and decades after. You know what, man she made a good point because you find yourself still doing certain things and repositioning yourself that you've known better doing certain things and repositioning yourself that you've known better, jay, that you know better. You see yourself in that same position and nobody needs to tell you anything. You just need to reflect back to what mom or that significant woman in your life poured into you and told you. You just have to take yourself back to that place, man. They don't have to tell you again.
Speaker 2:That's right. Yeah, yeah, man, m don't have to tell you again, that's right. Yeah, yeah, man, moms, they got that, you know, I guess you could call it like a magic touch at some point, like they got that Midas touch man, one of the things about my mom, like that I just know. I got from her, just from, you know, just from observing and just seeing, you know how she was. She was always like super, super patient, you know what I mean. Like she was never like, you know, knowing that she might be facing some disappointment. You know, and I ain't going to lie, I did get.
Speaker 2:I got my behind whooped right, like listen, that is a fact. Plenty of lashings, okay, okay, but you know, it was always with love and you know how they say it's hurting, it's going to hurt me, then it's going to hurt you. I'm not so sure about how true that statement is. I don't think it has validity. Okay, you're not getting whooped right now. Yeah, hey, that says black folks.
Speaker 2:But nah, you know, yeah, like mom's super patient man, you know, and I got a lot, I think, of just my being able to observe and just kind of witness just people. You know what I'm saying. My mom is really like super, super smart, super intelligent a reader, saying my mom is really, uh, like super, super smart, super intelligent a reader and she's always, um, I don't know what, what's the word like uh, empathetic, you know empathetic, kind of able to to see, you know what people not still able to, to kind of peep from afar, like you gotta, like, you gotta mind your business too, but you still gotta see, like what, what people you know what I'm saying like like what people got going on man, so, um, yeah, man, shout out, shout out to mom, um, so many lessons, so many, so so much instilled and just um, so much love, man, yeah, so much love. Yeah, yeah, I dig that, so much love.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, I dig that. Let's talk about when it comes to relationships, jay, what has been the best advice that you've gotten from a woman, whether it was a best friend, whether it was mom, whether it was grandma what do you feel like was one of the most impactful things lessons or the most impactful advice, I should say when it came to relationships, whether how to heal, how to approach it, any of those aspects?
Speaker 2:Yeah, the best lesson I definitely would say probably. For me the best lesson was just always be yourself. Be yourself. Don't try to impress or shapeshift into something that you're not, because you want a woman that is going to love and like you for who you are. So no flexing, no flogging. You know Not the flog? Hey, that's some slang, ain't it?
Speaker 1:Yeah, it is.
Speaker 2:That's regional, that's regional. But yeah, you know, just no faking it, man. Definitely, just be yourself and always do your best. You know, give it your best and if, at the end of the day, you know you did your best, then hey, you got nothing to hold your head over, so yeah, when it comes to relationship, I just always be myself.
Speaker 1:I think that's powerful. I want to pivot a little bit. I know, uh, you know we're giving women their flowers. I also have to give, uh. Put women on notice, uh. And you sparked it, though, jay. You sparked it when you said you know, be yourself. You know, a lot of times men act a certain way because they want to impress a woman.
Speaker 2:Oh, 100%. You know what I?
Speaker 1:mean, I don't think that women really understand that, like, when, when they talk about representative, it's not a representative. They don't want to be who they are, but they want to be someone who you can appreciate because of what you have been describing, what you've been talking about. Like you know, ladies will have a whole conversation about what she likes men to do and then wonder why men are trying to do what she said she likes men to do, right, you know, hey, yeah, I'd like to. You know, boat rides are really nice and you know weekend trips or spa days, and he's thinking to say I don't do none of that. He's thinking his head, I don't know when I horseback riding, you know, like, they go horseback riding every other weekend or something. Stop, right. So just, you know, guys are going to do the things or attempt and, as the lady say, a guy that pays attention right is going to notice some of the things that she mentioned, and so he's going to try his best to facilitate that, if you will Right, if you will right and so got as, uh, you said, jay, you know, being yourself, there's some things that he may not even be with he may.
Speaker 1:Are you talking about? Yeah, I like seafood. I want to go and just have a fresh grouper. And you know, snapper and all that and a guy like me. I'm going to get sick. I'm going to get ill if I take you to a restaurant and you're eating ill Seriously, right, and you know you talk. Oh yeah, I want a grouper and all this. I don't know why grouper keeps coming into mind, but a lot of ladies be talking about you know. Meanwhile, you know Good Well, you got tilapia and catfish in your freezer.
Speaker 1:Come on, stop playing with me. You might have some fish sticks in there, man.
Speaker 2:No, seriously.
Speaker 1:Straight up man, but you want snapper and grouper okay.
Speaker 2:You want the salmon and the no grouper. Nah, I ain't never had none of that. I'm cool on that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm super cool on that. But you know I said that to say you made a good point about being yourself. I think that if we really look at it as face value, you know there may be some things that that you may have to compromise, because everything else you know the vibe is good. You're physically attracted, because everything else you know the vibe is good. You're physically attracted to that person, you know. You like their intellect, their vernacular, you like everything about them, their style, their presence. But there may be some things it's like OK, you're not really into that, or you may not be into that, or maybe foreign to you, or you may not be into that or may be foreign to you. These are really the opportunities to see if you're willing to adapt and compromise, because it's going to take some give and take for relationships to work, even getting to know part Like, let me tell you something that's crazy. We'll get back to you I mean, we're talking about you ladies but we'll get back to giving you the fly.
Speaker 1:Right now I just want to give you some game. Can we give you game first? Can we give you game alongside the fly? Look, a lot of ladies are out here with a list of demands. The lods, I call them man, these ladies have a list of demands. Uh, 5, 11, 5'11 or better, all his teeth. No side teeth missing.
Speaker 1:He has to have style, he has to be able to change not even a tire man change your flooring, your tiles or something like that. He needs to come with all this stuff, right. But what does he get in return when he brings all that to the table and more? And of course, you have to be realistic. He may not be able to do all those things, but he can learn to do those things. But what is his incentive? What is his incentive? And thisoh, what is his incentive? And this is what I'm talking about. I'm talking about the guy that is a good catch. You know your lady's talking about you're a good catch and things like that. I'm not talking about the bums. The bums is not going to do anything anyway. He don't care. It's just a numbers game to him. Either you holler at him or you don't. If you talk to him again, he doesn't really care. But when we're talking about an actual good match, like brothers need incentives, man. Yeah, incentives is important, yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, you got to have something to, because, at the end of the day, if, like, it would go either way. If I got all this, I'm bringing this to the table, which I'm meeting your demands right. Supply and demand. I got the supplies to meet the demand. Now we didn't came to the point. And what's on the table for me? Where's my plate? Where am I going? Come on, it can't be lopsided. Listen, I'm a libra, so everything is always gonna come down to balance with me and reciprocation. And if, if I don't feel the reciprocation, if I don't feel the balance, I might, I might bounce, and that's just being honest. That's just me.
Speaker 2:I have a really hard time with you know, knowing that I might be providing this, that and a third pulling this way, or even in conversation, like if we talking, and I feel like I'm pulling, like I'm pulling the like. I got the conversation on my back. I'm carrying this all Like. Why am I doing this? There's no, no, I'm not doing that man. I'm carrying this all Like. Why am I doing this? There's no, no, I'm not doing that man. And I hate to go off on a tangent right now. I kind of went off on a tangent right there, but you sparked it all. Pops, I did, you sparked that all. But yeah, man, just for me it's balance. So the reciprocation, and if I have what it takes and you recognize that, then it's only right for you to, you know, to reciprocate and meet my, meet my energy and meet me where I am.
Speaker 1:yeah, I like that and that's fair. Let's be honest, that's fair. Uh, you, you want someone who's going to put in some effort you know, effort goes a long way right? Just somebody who is concerned, somebody who is putting that effort using their energy their resources and being patient and understanding man.
Speaker 1:that goes a long way versus buying or just saying something or just doing something in the moment to just get through that, that effort and that consistency of just showing someone that you truly care about their feelings for one and you are enjoying getting to know them and who they are to the core. So let me add this, because I think that this is important and this may take us all the way out of of of this particular episode, but I want to talk about, um, how us men can support and uplift women more, because I will take responsibility as acknowledging not that I'm part of that community, but I will acknowledge that there is way too many men that are are degrading, that are talking about our women, that are, you know, just bringing out a lot of negative connotation to our women and it's it's drowning out all the positive empowerment and encouragement for women. How do you feel about that, jeff?
Speaker 2:Yeah, I definitely agree. There was a little key term a while back. I don't know if it's still being used today, but they say it's toxic masculinity for, you know, maybe just for the safety or the surroundings of women, you know, just being careless around women, not really taking their health or their, you know, through all avenues, just them serious. So we definitely got to uplift, support our women. You know that has to be, you know, target, like moving forward. We got to make sure that's a point.
Speaker 2:You know I always, you know, I talk to my son's mom and I assure her that it's like. You know, he's going to be the perfect gentleman. He's going to make sure that he treats women with respect. You know he's going to make sure that he treats women with respect. He's going to make sure that there's no misogyny going on, there's no making them uncomfortable in the workplace and doing all that. But at the same time, because we are also in a world where we kind of on a little bit of a tightrope with how much we can say to women without them feeling uncomfortable. But you just got to teach them and learn, right. I mean teach my son, raising him.
Speaker 2:But we have to learn from our women. We have to listen to what they want and expect from us, right? We gotta stop shutting them out and and doing the the um, the mansplaining and the toxic masculinity or assuming that we know all the time what they want, like we. We just got to stop and listen and that's where the support is going to come from right, because the best way to get your information is from a primary source. So we go to them. Ask the women in your life you know, fellas, y'all listening right now. Ask the women in your life. What can I do to support you more, what can I do to make sure that I'm making sure that you feel heard and I'm uplifting you, and they'll tell you. I'm sure they probably listen. Yeah, yeah, indeed, they will let you know. You know what it is they need and how you can help and provide them with a better, you know safety net and well-being and the relationships, friendships, all the above that's really good.
Speaker 1:That's really good. I think that something that was mentioned or was very popular in the last couple of decades is safe space. Um, there's always going to be. Um, an important aspect of things is creating a safe space, because I've never you know the way they're talking to each other. You would think that they've known each other because they were so comfortable to argue and debate, and I'm just like man. First of all, dude, why are you going back and forth with a woman Like, first of all, that's you breaking the you breaking, breaking one of the command minutes yeah, we know what that is you know I'm saying so.
Speaker 1:You already in violation of c45-68, not man code. You're breaking the man code and it makes me, um, you know, really wonder, like you mentioned, just what is the relationship within your household. How do you talk to your sisters? How do you talk to your daughters? How do you teach your daughters? Are you teaching your daughters, are you learning from those that are, you know, have your best well-being at heart, your grandma, your mom? And it just lets me know, uh, some of those internal relationships you know are need some improvement. Let me just put it like that, because everybody's situation is unique.
Speaker 1:But, at the same time, respecting others is respecting yourself. Respecting other people is is actually respecting yourself. So it shows that you are willing to learn, willing to listen. You know ego and pride is something else, especially men. We already know how it is with women. But men, as as leaders, as those that you know are supposed to be, you know the one to. You know, help navigate the family and give the guidance you know from God, and doing that for the family man. You have to be approachable. You, you know your significant other or the women around you. They have to feel confident in giving you information or sharing information or even expressing themselves. But if you typically, you know, have an attitude and you always got too much, what did you say?
Speaker 1:too much dip on your chip like that's you all the time, like, damn, maurice is always mad, mad, I can't say nothing to him. I got to, you know, double dutch, to talk to this brother, you know, you got to say a little bit and get about it, you know. And so, um, supporting our women is is really creating that safe space, because women can thrive in a safe space, jay, they can thrive, you know, and that can change the whole trajectory of what's going on in the household. Because, again, sometimes, as brothers, man, this world beats us up.
Speaker 1:You know, god is going to give the energy and the wisdom to the woman. I mean, you think you're just going to be on your face and then you're going to levitate a big hand they come from the clouds is going to come and pick you up. No, it's going to come through someone. So if, if you can't even give a safe space to your mom, to your sister, to your, your daughter, to your wife, your companion, that that's where your help and support is gonna come from. It ain't gonna be me. I'm not coming to your house to pick you up when you got a whole woman over there, why would you want me to? That's think about it, man. That is insane work crazy work crazy work, man.
Speaker 1:Even nasty work sometimes, right Nasty. So, yeah, actually that's my guy, we're going to have to get my guy, we're going to have to get him on the show. He is hilarious. Yeah, we're going to have to get him on the show. But, you know, obviously we're going to continue to honor, give flowers to our women, not only this month, but just be mindful and more aware of just creating a safe space and encouraging and supporting our women, because it's tough out there for them as well. It's really tough. I'm not, you know, we're not even going to compare and contrast the battle of men and women. You know, uh, melanated men and women, it's a tough world out there, you know. So we have to stick together. We have to be the first ones to uh make sure that we compliment and encourage and show love and things like that. So that's always going to play a big part on our community and in the broad. Jay.
Speaker 2:That's right. I could not agree more. Pop Could not agree more. At the end of the day, appreciating women isn't just about this one month, like you said. It's about how we show up every day, whether it's recognizing their contributions, supporting them or just listening with respect. But it starts with effort. As us men, we got to have that responsibility to uplift and protect and stand behind the women in our lives.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, I dig that, I dig that. So let's do a part two, you know, and just continue to kind of show the importance of women's appreciation month, the importance of just recognizing women's appreciation month, the importance of, uh, just recognizing women's contributions. And you know personal stories and things like that. My grandma, my grandma, your great grandma, um, is an icon, um, in the state of Rhode Island. Uh, she was the first woman welder and so she was recognized by the state of Rhode Island as a first, and I don't even know how far back. That's amazing, yeah, so she is amazing. She did transition or pass at 88 years old. So, you know, lived an amazing life and, you know, iconic. So we have that legacy man in our DNA. So we have to continue to do that on the male side and the woman side. So, yeah, I mean, that was back in the 1930s when she was honored man.
Speaker 2:Good grief. That's amazing History 100 years man.
Speaker 1:That's almost 100 years man. That's pretty incredible. Again, we want to shout out to the ladies, all the amazing ladies throughout the world You're incredible, we love you, we support you yes. Not only the month of March, but but always. So, speaking of always, we always appreciate when you tune in and lock in with us, Jay. Give them the website and just let them know, man, if they got any questions and things like that, man, how to get that information to us.
Speaker 2:Yes, indeed, of course. We appreciate you guys for checking in. If you need more information, go to popsandsunconversationscom, your one-stop shop, to get all the info right. You can follow our social media from there. You can listen to the podcast. From there, you can ask your questions. Do it. It's all there, popsinconversationscom, don't forget it.
Speaker 1:Indeed. So we will see you, beautiful people, next episode. If you missed the last episode of the Last Couple, you have an opportunity to just go back and listen to them. That's right. The beauty of podcasts is you can go back and listen to some of the previous podcasts, take down some notes, share it with your friends and family and, as always, we look forward to rocking with you next week, next episode. All right, it's your favorite seal fox, rob mulloy and mr check three times until we meet again.
Speaker 2:Peace we out.
