Pops and Son Conversations
Join US Air Force Veteran, Presidential Achievement Award Recipient, author, philanthropist, and social media influencer, Rob Malloy, and his son, author and model, Javan Anderson, as they navigate the generation gap with humor and heart.
On this podcast, Rob and Javan tackle a wide range of topics – from life lessons and fatherhood to current events and pop culture – offering a unique blend of old-school wisdom and new-school perspectives. Expect lively debates, unexpected insights, and plenty of laughs along the way.
Tune in to Pops and Son Conversations and discover:
- Candid conversations: Rob and Javan share their honest thoughts and experiences, providing a refreshing take on intergenerational relationships.
- Diverse perspectives: Hear how Rob's traditional values intersect with Javan's modern outlook, creating dynamic and engaging discussions.
- Humor and heart: Enjoy a show that's both entertaining and thought-provoking, leaving you with a smile and something to ponder.
Subscribe now and join the conversation!
Pops and Son Conversations
Holiday Pressure, Fatherly Balance
The holidays can feel like a high-wire act: keep the magic alive for the kids, honor family traditions, and somehow protect January from December’s receipts. We open our hearts about the pressure fathers carry this time of year and share the practical ways we stay grounded—so joy wins and debt doesn’t.
We talk about the early hit of Black Friday, the second budget that sneaks in for Christmas, and how easy it is to blur wants and needs when the cart is full and the lights are bright. From decor dreams to gift lists, one of us plays the level-headed role: set a ceiling, define the priorities, and spend with the future in mind. That doesn’t mean skipping the sparkle. It means choosing the kind of sparkle kids remember—time, rituals, and shared laughter—over the pile that fades in a week.
We also dive into a different kind of gift: financial literacy. Gifting stock or a simple index fund alongside a favorite toy reframes what generosity can be. Kids learn that money can grow, that ownership matters, and that a gift’s value isn’t only its price tag but the lessons it carries. And yes, we address the social media effect—designer pajamas, label flashing, and performative trees—and why keeping some moments private protects the meaning we’re trying to build.
If you’re navigating partner expectations, schoolyard comparisons, or your own urge to overdo it, this conversation offers perspective, humor, and a toolkit for a calmer season. Join us as we choose presence over pressure, memories over mountains of boxes, and a plan that still feels warm and human. If this resonated, follow the show, share it with a parent who needs it, and leave a quick review to help others find the conversation.
Please follow Pops and Son Conversations on the website, popsandsonconversations.com, and social media @popsandsonconversations
And welcome to another episode of Pops and Sun Conversations. Yes, it is your favorite silver fox, Rob Malloyd.
SPEAKER_00:And yes, it's your favorite poet. You already know it, Mr. Ched, three times.
SPEAKER_01:Bam. Hey, we made it to a new month. Welcome, December. How you feeling, Jay?
SPEAKER_00:I feel good, Pops. How you feeling?
SPEAKER_01:I'm feeling good. You know, um, it's a new month. It's the last month of 2025. Man, how time has been flying.
SPEAKER_00:Right. Sheesh.
SPEAKER_01:Sheesh. So uh, you know, we're back. Hey, we want to thank you guys for an amazing year. It has been nothing less than spectacular. So much support. We appreciate the love. You know, we're just thankful for, you know, the encouragement because this isn't this isn't easy. And I'm not talking about the podcast business. Um, I'm not even talking about building a brand. I'm just talking about the consistency and uh the bandwidth and wherewithal to show up every single day, man. It takes a lot of encouragement and support, Jake.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, that's a fact. It's days you don't want to, it's days where you rather, you know, sit back, chill, relax, take a mental day, and all these different things. But I will say that, you know, the support that we get when we're out and about at these different events or just, you know, just around the spot locally has been a great motivation. You know what I mean? People like to hear, you know, our perspective on things. They like the the father-son dynamic that we have and they and they want to see it. They know that um it's important representation. So um that definitely means a lot.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, yeah. Tremendous support. Uh, we have a lot of uh gratitude and thankfulness and gratefulness. So thank you guys. We appreciate it, and that motivates us to keep going. You know, when we think about uh the different father and son dynamics out there, whether they're curating an existing relationship or they may be looking to rekindle a relationship or you know, rebuild what you already have, what's existing. Uh all of that uh we take into account and it motivates us and inspires us to continue to do what we're doing. That being said, December's here. There's some things that we have to talk about. And um uh as we go into the holiday, now Thanksgiving family day was amazing. Enjoyed the family, ate good. I consistently had the itis. Like, man, you just gotta be careful out there when you're eating, man. Some folks just eating to be eating because it's there.
SPEAKER_00:Oh yeah. Like I said, man, you got hey, Thanksgiving, that's the the time where you guard yourself. You're gonna be the probably the biggest. You're gonna have a food baby.
SPEAKER_01:The biggest. Hey, man. Oh man, listen, um, an amazing time. But you know, it also carries over because I think the Family Day Thanksgiving, you know, kicks off the the holiday uh as we navigate a little bit closer uh throughout December as we get to Christmas and and Kwanzaa and different things like that as we uh navigate that. So that's what we're gonna talk about, uh kicking off, officially kind of kicking off the holiday season and what that looks like from a father's perspective, as a son's perspective. Uh I think that's important to talk about. So uh Jay, let's go ahead and do this, but let's just kind of jump in. And I want to ask you something uh right away. Like as uh as we get closer to you know the main holiday, uh Christmas, uh for a lot of folks, like what what do you feel like is the responsibility, you being a father, what is the responsibility or the pressures, if you will, of uh as we get a little closer?
SPEAKER_00:Um I would say, oh man. I would say the main the main pressure that I'm I'm feeling as we get closer is just making sure that, you know, it's it's a special moment, you know, making sure that it's it's um, you know, time to be remembered. Because, you know, when we think about our childhood and and around these times during the holidays, um there's a there's like a particular magic, you know, that that you may have I know everybody didn't grow up the same, but you may have experienced around Christmas time, you know, with with Santa Claus and the gifts and the reindeer and all these different tropes and things that we um, you know, that we kind of come up under. And, you know, my my thoughts and opinion on on it has evolved over time. Yeah, you know, especially growing up and just kind of looking back, but um it's still it's still something I want to provide for my son. At least him, you know, just having a good a good memory of these times around these holidays because there's just so much that that influences it, right? Yeah. Um, you know, so uh as a dad, as he gets older, I also want to instill in him as as he's able to understand, he's so young right now that he it's it's just lights and and snow and Santa and all and gifts and stuff right now. Um but as as he gets older, it's um, you know, I also feel the pressure of, you know, kind of having to explain to him like, you know, son, this what what this the meaning behind this holiday, you know, what what it what it really is about um from uh unfortunately from you know the the capitalist standpoint um and just how these different holidays are manufactured to get and you know I know I'm kind of going off on a tangent, but these these are the pressures that I think of, you know, as I'm you know, as I'm raising him. But for right now, it's just mainly making sure that, you know, he got some good gifts and he's you know he's happy at the at the end of the day.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, that's that's uh some important parts. And I can I can kind of remember around that time, you know, when the kids are a little bit younger. And it's a it's a sense of responsibility, right? When you think about it, the person that I would say has a lot of of leeway, or at least wants to have a lot of leeway and opportunity to create is typically gonna be, you know, the mother. Um, typically gonna be a lady and whatnot. Um, I don't know too many guys that is all about, hey, let's put some lights up. Uh let's, you know, have a specific kind of tree. Let's do an eight-foot tree this year, right? And and and make sure that it has, you know, snow, the icicles, four or five different rows of lights. I don't care about none of that. You know, uh, I don't know too many men that that get into that. So I would say that the ladies, you know, definitely have the decor. Um, but at the same time, it has to be funded.
SPEAKER_00:That's funny, see what I'm saying?
SPEAKER_01:It has to be funded. So, so as men, and I'm not saying that the ladies can't afford it, because they can, right? They can. But the overall responsibility, like like one guy is gonna be like, all right, baby, go ahead and spend a thousand dollars of your own money, and then I'm gonna work on some other things, right? It typically doesn't work like that, you know. So she comes up with all these ideas, she comes up with these things that that, you know, the experience, if you will, that she wants to create. And then we basically co-signers, man.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah, you'll you'll begin some some Amazon screenshots of shopping carts and and the stuff that that's that's decor and things like that.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, so I think that the the pressure um is more so is making overseeing and making sure that a lot of certain things that that are brought to your attention happens. And you know, as I've gotten older, you know, I've I've looked at, you know, um Christmas uh around that time is the most expensive time frame. So we're talking about the month of December because you have to think about things kick off Black Friday. All right, so so your money is already moving before December gets here, right? And so the Black Friday is a combination or a culmination, if you will, I'm pulling out the the Websters, of when uh money money gets spent. Right? So we're talking about all kinds of stuff happening around Black Friday that does not necessarily have to do with anything for Christmas, Jay. We're talking about TVs, we're talking about furniture, uh, we're talking about you know, wardrobe. Now none of this, like this is a different budget than Christmas, Jake. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, right. Right? So you need the Black Friday monies, and then as December kicks in, it's almost like this ain't got nothing to do with what you just spent for Black Friday. We need a new budget, sir. Right, and so as we get into that, um man, it it's it can be uh a financial challenge. And I'm not saying like you're spending money that you don't have, but you know, credit card does go up 70% right in in December, the the usage, if you will. But when you start thinking about things that are bought, is it necessary? We are getting the especially for the people that we're getting them for. Like, look, I don't I don't have a wife right now, right? But if I did have a wife and she got to talking about how she wanna everybody that she knows needs a gift, she may not be my wife next year. I'm just kidding. Like I'm just saying we're gonna have to have a conversation, right? Because you got the guy kid. Now hold up, hold up, baby. Your guy's son 35 years old. I I think he I think he's good on on uh on an Apple Watch. I don't think that we need to get him a thousand dollar apple watch at 35 years old. He should be in his career by now, right? Right? So I just think, man, the generosity can can be uh uh just a little bit too much when we get into December. And so again, my expectation is to be the level-headed individual as we approach the holidays. How about that, y'all? Y'all like that? Uh-uh. Don't be hitting the button. No, there ain't no other episode. You gotta stick with this one. Ain't nothing happens.
SPEAKER_00:They try to click next, next episode.
SPEAKER_01:All right, just like the barbecue, right? This is it. So uh the expectation um for uh for a father again is to be the the one that is gonna think logical uh during the season, uh the one that's going to think uh responsibly and the one that's really just gonna have to take charge. Now, I know that there's this, you know, we create the vibe because we don't want to be called a Grinch. I I get that. But at the same time, we don't want to be, you know, overspending foods as well. So that's something that we have to take uh in consideration. I don't think that women really have to process that part.
SPEAKER_00:No, no, I don't think so. You know, I I think like this, like I could be a Grinch now or I could be a Grinch later because we done spent too much. You know what I'm saying? Like, you're gonna have to pick your poison on on what we gotta do. So I think that is a big part of it, Pop. Just um being level-headed, you know, making sure that the expenses and and and and you know, honestly what it is, women, we love you, but y'all are sopaholics, man. Y'all don't know how to, like, y'all, y'all will spend and y'all will buy things that are completely unnecessary. Yeah, you you know you do it. You got stuff in your house right now that you don't even use, but you bought it because you wanted it and and now it's just sitting there. So yeah, you need that little voice on your shoulder that's saying, nah, don't buy that. You don't need that one. Put that back. So I think that um, especially during the holidays when there's so many different sales and things going on, and folks just trying to get you to buy stuff just because it's 50 and 80% off, just to have it. No. No. We we we we gotta we gotta have a voice of of reason during that point. And, you know, during the holidays, you know, gift giving is is is is great, you know, it's awesome, but really I think it's it's it's more about um, you know, just kind of not I I was I definitely would say family time for sure, but it it always comes back to, you know, really understanding, like every every these these holidays, man, I don't want I don't want to get too political. I don't want to get too political, but um I just use them as as reminders, you know what I'm saying, of like how important the family is because everybody doesn't have the luxury to to go out and stop until they drop or go and do the black, the Black Friday thing. So it's really people out there that's not even really concerned about, you know, the financial uh side of it. Um and they're just kind of using, you know, what they have and being thankful for that. And the gifts, you know, they may, you know, create create gifts out of just you know, just moments and memories, you know, and that's just as important, right, than going out and spending a thousand bucks on on a on a bunch of different gifts. I think that we have to kind of remember um the root of it all and and what that really is, and that's the moments and memories that we make it during these times.
SPEAKER_01:Sure, sure. Um, that's extremely important and in value because you also have to think about the precedence that you're setting, right? Uh so when we start talking about uh, and I'm not really, you spend what you want to spend, okay? So we're not here to to be financial planners or even your budget, but I think just to put some reminders out there of a lot of times we do spend money on frivolous things, right? You you uh have opportunities to buy stock, right? Think about that. Instead of buying a thousand dollars or five hundred dollars in Nike, how about gift your child five hundred and night stock? Like, what do you think about you know something like that? I think that that would show value, and then it it'll also set a principle of how to spend money wisely and how to make your money make money.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, so that's a great lesson.
SPEAKER_01:Yes, yeah. So I think that we have to get into that. I know that I haven't been previously, because you know, a lot of people look at the value of the gift versus the value in the gift. And I think that if we can just kind of have that mindset, um, that that would help. You know, it it would help, especially when it comes to what what kids value and what they look at, you know. Um, because I I don't know too many kids out here talking about mommy and dad, me, mommy and dad had bought me a thousand dollars in um in Amazon versus the Amazon boxes was to the ceiling when I opened the door. So I think that that's pretty powerful. We can start using it as an opportunity of some financial literacy, Jack.
SPEAKER_00:Facts. You know, that really opens uh the door to uh a much, a much wider conversation just about, you know, materialism and and like you said, how we spend on things that, you know, how many Christmas gifts do you have that you've gotten over the years that you still utilize today or that you still, you know what I'm saying? Like it eventually, you know, these gifts and things like that will um, you know, come to an end of their use or they'll get older, or you know, whatever the case is. Maybe you do have some things that, you know, you still have, but I think most gifts that that we receive um, you know, it are are finite or or they come to a to the limit of usage. But like you said, investing in something like um some type of stock that, you know what I'm saying, that maybe you are going, like you said, you're gonna go buy some Nike or going to go buy some, look into that stock because um as it appreciates over time, you not only are, you know, giving them an uh a valuable asset, but you're also teaching, right? You're teaching and kind of reframing the narrative around what a gift is, what a gift means, because I mean, let's think about it. You know, that's kind of like one of those gifts that keeps on giving, so to speak. You know, you stocks, you got dividends, you you know, you continue to buy um and you see that price rise over time. Like that's really one of the best gifts that you can get. You know what I'm saying? It's gonna beat out the Apple Watch or or you know, the pair of shoes or whatever the case is. And I'm not telling nobody not to buy gifts, but maybe we can incorporate um a part of the budget into, you know, let's diversify it a little bit. Let's diversify the gifts. I think that that's a good a good concept, Pops.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, I agree with you 1,000%. Um, you know, let's let's kind of drag social media into this thing because they typically amplify, you know, the comparison. You know, you you uh you pull up your uh Instagram or TikTok or something like that, and you see all these extravagant trees and the light show in the front yard and the estates of uh of just all of these things going on, and and then under the tree, you got 2,000 presents in there, right? And you know, certain presents aren't gonna be wrapped, right? The the designer gifts, those those don't you gotta see that.
SPEAKER_00:Oh, yeah, you gotta see that label.
SPEAKER_01:You gotta see the label on the screen. And then, you know, you got the match of pajamas, and you know, the the pajamas are designer. And so the thing is, like, if you really just if that's just what you got going on, then then why does it have to be on display? I would think that some moments will be intimate moments, right? So there's certain things, I in my personal opinion, y'all, certain things don't even need to make it to social media, right? It just needs to be our private experience as our family member, as our family members, and just kind of cherish these moments, man. Not everything needs to be out there, but we're talking about social media, right? So that'll never happen. People are gonna do the most many times. So uh that's kind of how that goes. But you know, but as a father, again, you know, we still have some responsibilities. Like, for instance, you know, we we have to be the voice of reason when it comes to, you know, shielding the the family's financial stress. Like it's almost like, okay, babe, if you have a significant other, whatnot. Like we we still have to live in 2026, right? We we still got some other goals that have nothing to do with spending money during the holidays that we need to take in consideration. So I think that that's something that uh we also have to do. And Jay, just let me let me uh give you this here as we as we wrap this thing up now. Um as a father of uh of a youngin', do you feel like as a as a father that there's some type of fear of disappointing the kids, you know, or the partner if if the holiday isn't big enough, if if there's certain gifts that aren't giving, if if there is not the the uh certain aesthetic of the holiday season, is is there a fear of that or is there uh a major uh you know thought process or mindset of that happening?
SPEAKER_00:Well, for me, I have to say, I have to say no. I think that not so much as a fear. Um my son is five, and you know, he's had some he has some some good holidays. You know, I I can say that he's had some good holidays, you know. He's he isn't at that age yet to where he understands to ask for certain things or right, you know what I'm saying, son, or this is what I want. I haven't started getting those those questions yet. So we'll I will that'll be we'll I'll check back in on the pressures and you know what I'm saying.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, because he's in school now.
SPEAKER_00:Right, right, right. So yeah, right. So that compares to yeah, so um, but so far, you know, it's it's been good. He's been, you know, grateful and and and you know, he's he's had some good holidays. So yeah, so it's it's been good. But I do think that, you know, like I said before, I do want to make it a point, you know, kind of that he understands what these holidays are and just kind of explain it to him. Um, you know, that gifts are good, gifts are great, but you know, at the end of the day, um, you know, it's really just more about presence, you know, being present and being around family and and and spending that time and making moments, you know, because I do think about you know my childhood and and and maybe sometimes I was ungrateful um for some things and that wasn't right, you know, but I didn't I didn't understand it. You know, nobody really explained to me, you know what I'm saying, like all right, yeah, this is the holidays or whatever the case is, but it it ain't all about gifts. Um I think that's the main thing is just just to know, like, hey man, it's not all about what you don't get, you know, around this time. Um, you know, just just be happy for what you have. I think that's that's a good reminder of being thankful and grateful for your health, your life, your family. You know, you got a roof over your head, and and this kind of sounds cliche, but it's so easy for us to stray, especially during the holidays, is just think about what we want, what we gotta get, and you know what I mean. So um, yeah, but I say we'll check in down the line. You know, I'll let you know how how that's a good thing.
SPEAKER_01:We perhaps check in down the line because when he does get back to school, thank God for the for the holiday season, right? Um for the kids, but there's gonna be, you know, some stories. My daddy got me a motorcycle for my mommy bought me an iPhone 25. Like, man, right. Who is she? Right? So uh, yeah, so those stories are coming. Um, but you know, I definitely commend you. And I'm so proud of you of the principles that you installed in my grandson. And he does understand and kind of appreciate uh that things are gifts and everything is just automatically afforded to you. You're not entitled to anything. And so, you know, that's a great job on that. So, look, uh, I think we may have to kind of extend this. You know, all month long we're gonna be talking about, you know, what goes on in this month of the holiday season of December. And, you know, we'll we'll navigate from what we did today to, you know, dating during the holidays and what those expectations look like. Um, really quick reminder those of you in the Atlanta area, December the 6th, which is this Saturday, um, I will be your official Santa for the city of Stonecrest. So big shout out to the city of Stonecrest. If you guys know anything about the city of Stonecrest, on uh uh D the first weekend of December, um I've been the official Santa for the last, I think this is going on four years now. And so I'll be there, free event. Uh just pull up, look on all the social media, uh, and we'll make sure that it's that it's up there. But the city of Stonecrest, um, we will uh be in the building. Uh Jay, are you you gonna be Santa's helper, man? You dressed up as an elf this year?
SPEAKER_00:Oh, Pops, don't do it to me.
SPEAKER_01:Gotta be a Santa's helper, man.
SPEAKER_00:Oh man. Hey, man. Hey, I'm down for the cause, man. I I get one of them uh elf elf elf costumes, man.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, it is, man. At least just the hat, man. We ain't gonna require the ears this year, man. But drop the hat off on yourself and uh let's get it. So look, guys, we appreciate you uh once again, another episode of Pops and Sun Conversations. Uh, remember, we're streaming on all platforms where you can listen to a podcast, right? So just uh make sure you can also go to our website, w dot popsandson conversations with an S dot com, and you can find out about our events, uh how to book us, and uh everything that we have coming, as well as what you guys want to see from us. So signing out once again. It's your favorite Silver Fox Robin Lloyd.
SPEAKER_00:Mr. Check three times, baby.
SPEAKER_01:All right, happy holidays. We'll see you next episode. Yep.
