Pops and Son Conversations
Join US Air Force Veteran, Presidential Achievement Award Recipient, author, philanthropist, and social media influencer, Rob Malloy, and his son, author and model, Javan Anderson, as they navigate the generation gap with humor and heart.
On this podcast, Rob and Javan tackle a wide range of topics – from life lessons and fatherhood to current events and pop culture – offering a unique blend of old-school wisdom and new-school perspectives. Expect lively debates, unexpected insights, and plenty of laughs along the way.
Tune in to Pops and Son Conversations and discover:
- Candid conversations: Rob and Javan share their honest thoughts and experiences, providing a refreshing take on intergenerational relationships.
- Diverse perspectives: Hear how Rob's traditional values intersect with Javan's modern outlook, creating dynamic and engaging discussions.
- Humor and heart: Enjoy a show that's both entertaining and thought-provoking, leaving you with a smile and something to ponder.
Subscribe now and join the conversation!
Pops and Son Conversations
Dear Santa, Please Pay Off My Credit Card
The lights are bright, the inbox is full of “limited time offers,” and the pressure to make magic can crush the joy right out of the season. We slow the pace to talk honestly about presence over presents, how to honor grief without dimming celebration, and why grace is the best gift you can give yourself and others. From the awkward New Year text that might reopen a door to the quiet courage it takes to accept an olive branch, we frame the holidays as a chance to reconnect with what matters.
Money talk is unavoidable—and necessary. We unpack the hidden costs of going “all out,” the pride that keeps dads silent when the bill comes due, and the credit traps that spike limits while draining peace. You’ll hear practical, no-fluff ways to set a budget that survives January, teach kids financial boundaries, and shift the focus from more stuff to more meaning. We share how to introduce giving at ages 10–12, use homemade gifts to build empathy, and wean teens from the gift pile toward intentional choices and experiences that grow them.
As the calendar turns, we move from reflection to execution. Think mental declutter, not denial; financial reset, not guilt; and goals that are few, clear, and written down. We make the case for reset over restart—keep the lessons, pivot the plan. That lens applies to business, relationships, and community: scale what works, exit what harms, and remember that new people solve old problems. Let family stay family without forcing them into customers, and go find the audience your work actually serves. We’re stepping into 2026 with gratitude, focus, and accountability. If this conversation helped, share it with someone who needs it, subscribe for more real talk, and leave a review so others can find the show. What are you resetting next year?
Please follow Pops and Son Conversations on the website, popsandsonconversations.com, and social media @popsandsonconversations
Okay, welcome to another episode and the final episode of 2025 Pops and Sun Conversations. It is your favorite silver fox Rob Malloy.
SPEAKER_02:And it's J V here, Mr. Check Three Times.
SPEAKER_00:And there we have it. Hey, it's uh it's a beautiful day. How you feeling, Jay?
SPEAKER_02:I'm feeling good. I'm feeling great. I'm feeling thankful.
SPEAKER_00:Okay, that's where we're at. And so look, guys, uh, you know, this is uh the last episode for uh uh 2025. Uh we're still obviously in December, and we're still talking about the holiday season. Uh we're gonna finish strong, and uh we want to wish everybody uh happy holiday season. You know, thank you for listening to the podcast. Thank you for your support. And uh Jay, let's jump right into this thing.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, yeah, let's do it. So uh I know the last few pods, we kind of talked about, you know, we talked about some family stuff, we talked about some holiday things. So, you know, it's it's that time of the year still. And I think one of the one of the most important things to remember is that um, you know, we we should be thinking about presence over presence. I know those two words sound the same, but catch catch what I'm saying. So, you know, being present um is is really is really super important this time because you know during this time of the year, you know, people dealing with with all types of things. So we know that that that family is important and that um you know you want to be around the people that that love you and and who you have love for. Um so I know I know it could be a little bit too early too, but I also want to just mention that um also for for people who are not able to be with their loved ones, you know, um shout out to you, my heart goes out to you. Uh thoughts and prayers as well for the people that you know may you know be grieving around this time of year as well. Um it can be heavy, and I don't mean to start off, you know, too heavy, but but you know it's it's important just you know just to kind of mention that and really and really set the tone for the holidays because we always kind of look at it as um you know this this moment of of joy and and family and all that stuff is important too. But it's some folks out there that you know aren't as as fortunate, you know, and and can't be around family. So I just wanted to say as well that, you know, my heart and and thoughts and prayers going out to those people as well.
SPEAKER_00:Right. Yeah, and you know, definitely that. I second that. But also think that it's an opportunity to celebrate life, you know, if you have the ability to be around. Uh, I think it's a really good time to mend some of those relationships. You got to start looking like, was it that serious? Is it that serious to where, you know, you completely disassociate yourself or you feel in some type of way about some people that have been in your life, have made some contributions to your life, and have affected you in a lot of different ways. And so, you know, we have to give some grace um around this time as well, because it's uh, you know, it's the it's the reason for the season, if you will. Like we got to bring that into play.
SPEAKER_02:It's the reason for the season, facts. But like you mentioned, it's also, you know, it's the it's the culmination of the year. So it's a good time to also reflect, right? You know, as as things are wrapping up, I think it's good to look back on those relationships. You know, maybe some of them did sour, maybe some of them didn't develop, you know, the way that you might have wanted them to. So this is a really good moment to reflect. And I don't know about you, Pops, but you know, around the end of the year, especially around like uh New Year's and stuff like that, you know, you get all you get all these texts, and you might hear from people that you haven't heard from all you with a happy New Year text. And, you know, it it can seem performative, but I think that it's it's a good way to open, you know, open the door for conversation because some of them people, you know, they may have fell by the wayside, but it could have, you know, some people like what they isolate or maybe, you know, you fall off for whatever different reasons. So I think that it's it's good to reach out and it's also good to be receptive, you know what I'm saying? Don't brush it off like obviously somebody's throwing out that that olive branch to you, whatever differences y'all had during the year, could be reconciled. Yeah. Could be reconciled.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah. You know, again, I think we just have to be thankful, you know, cherish the moments that you have, cherish the relationships that you have, and you know, mend what you can you can mend. And, you know, with all that being said, you know, talking about managing stress during the holidays, Jay, I think that's very difficult because, again, as we mentioned a little uh a little bit earlier in the episode, for some people, uh, they have had some losses or you know, certain holidays are reminders of people that, you know, are no longer there and relationships that no longer exist. So um I think managing stress during the holidays, you know, just kind of being being grateful, you know, being extremely grateful uh for every single thing. You know, the home that you live in or the apartment that you live in, you got food, you know, uh clothes, um, and just you know, so much could have happened and things do happen in in minutes, you know, days and things like that. So um I think we have to continue to just kind of be thankful, you know, while we acknowledge those challenges. Um but yeah, I won't I want to talk about something, especially as as uh fathers, I think that we need to address. And I think it's important for us as again, the fathers, you know, to address, you know, certain things like uh overspending and debt. Like what do you think are some of the things that um should be talked about but get skipped over just because of the excitement of the festivities?
SPEAKER_02:Oh, it's so easy because I t I I tell you like this. I know there's one person that's that's worried about that bank account more than anybody else during these during these holidays. Because, you know, there's that pressure though to provide that, you know, that good Christmas and you know to get everything. But um, yeah, so as you know, as a dad, I think that I think it's important to, you know, like I mentioned earlier, like let's emphasize more on being present over you know, over the presence. Like, yeah, you know, kids gonna want what they want, your your family and and your spouse or your significant is gonna want what they want, but we still have to continue into the new year, right? And we're not trying to, you know, start from from zero. So it just it just has to make sense. And, you know, as a man, as a father, it is, I think that that duty does fall on us to kind of regulate, you know what I'm saying, kind of regulate um how the spinning is is going to go. And you just gotta be honest with yourself. You know, you you you gotta be honest. You you you can't, you know, you can't you can't give what you don't what you don't have, and that's just that's just the re the reality of it, right? So if you're going trying to go the extra mile to make, you know, to make wishes and and dreams come true, come true. I mean, um, there's only one person that's really going to suffer. And you know, as men, we like to suffer in silence. We're not gonna come forth and say, you know, we'll beat ourselves over, or you know, beat ourselves up because we knew we spent too much. Right. But we had we we got that pride that's not gonna say, man, you know, I I spent too much. And so you're gonna have some bills. Right, right. But no, even even look, you're gonna have some bills after that, you're gonna still have like it don't stop after af after Christmas, right? You still got people gonna that's gonna be dependent and asking you for things. Uh but now you're gonna be upset because, like, man, I done spent this, and you still like folks are never gonna be satisfied. So that's why you gotta regulate that, you know, during these times and and and kind of make sure that you overcompensate because you know it's it's it's not gonna stop. Like it's it's not gonna stop.
SPEAKER_00:That's such a tough conversation to have, especially if you um are in a relationship, you know, or and or you're you know, in a dynamic to where somebody celebrates real heavy in terms of uh you know uh making sure folks have gifts and you know uh making sure that there's some type of secret Santa and you know you have all these parties to attend to. Have you ever dated somebody that was just way over the top during the holiday season, especially around Christmas, right? And even brought you into it to where now she wants you to take in consideration of the shopping budget.
SPEAKER_02:Oh goodness. I can't say I I've been been that deep in the weeds, but I I definitely have, you know, it and and I I don't know if it's just it's it's just a me thing or if or if it's me getting older, but that that the whole Christmas spirit and the and the and the decorating and really going up, I I don't I don't care too much for that. I'm just being honest. Like I don't I don't need all of the visuals. I ain't gonna lie, I I really don't even need a Christmas tree. Like like we can we can exchange gifts and and and do things like that, but you know, I think that a lot of people do that that for the kids, you know, but I know it's a lot of adults that just that are just really into that as well. Um, but yeah, I just it's it's just it's just not my thing, Pops. Like I like I'm cool with the gift giving. We can exchange gifts and things like that, but I don't need, you know, all the lights and uh, you know, because I just feel like the emphasis is is kind of I'm not sure if if that's what's the most important thing to to emphasize, you know, during these times. Like I'm cool with exchanging gifts and and like I said, being present is is is really was was the most important to me.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah, no doubt about that. You know, but big shout out to those that really put a lot of energy to ensure that, you know, that there's some gifts because you regardless of how you feel right now, um once upon a time, I think we all were anticipating presents. We were anticipating uh the holiday dinner and festivities and and family around. And to be honest, man, there's there's not too many nicer feelings than waking up one morning and having a bunch of presents to open.
SPEAKER_02:Oh yeah.
SPEAKER_00:There's no feeling like that because when else is that gonna happen? In that capacity. Like, you're not gonna wake up, you know, Thanksgiving, you're not gonna wake up Easter, you know, morning with, I mean, you might have some eggs. What you gonna do with the eggs, right? With the colored eggs, man, not a whole lot you can do. So I understand the feeling. I understand, you know, the the kids get excited and things like that. I just feel like that in 2025, we have to be very uh aware uh and and prioritizing because historically, you know, families get into a whole bunch of debt around this season. And it's not funny because, you know, the the the predators of the credit card companies, you know, they're they're sneaky. They're up in your, you know, congratulations. You got a thousand dollar increase in your limit, and your credit score is still 512, right? So, you know, they are doing everything they can, you know, to get their their money off. And so I think that we still have to, again, you know, navigate those uh those pressures and those stresses and and have uh you know a real intent and not to overspend, man, because that's wild. But you know, also Jay, you know, um, you know, making sure that we teach the kids financial responsibility. Because if you don't, man, did do you know that the kids expect more and more each Christmas season? Like you can't go from 10 presents and be like, I'm gonna get you one good present in the following year. Yeah, no, you're not you got hey man, the the they believe in multiplicity, man. 10 lads, okay. We got 15, 20, 30, 30. Hey, look, man, I don't think I don't think if you allow a child to just continue to get gifts, I I think they'll they'll never run out of being excited to open up the gifts, man. Like if they got 112 gifts, they will sit there and open 112 gifts in one sitting, not even paying attention to each gift, like because they're thinking the next one's gonna be better than the previous one.
SPEAKER_02:Right. You know, that's that's a good, that's a really good point, just from like a psychological standpoint. Like in their brain, that's what's and that's and and and as you as you speak about that, I'm I'm literally thinking about myself opening all those gifts and just looking for, I'm either looking for the gift I really want, that's right, or um, you know, like you said, I'm looking for something that's gonna be better than the last one, which is which is really interesting because at the end of the day, it's like you just got 112 gifts.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, man.
SPEAKER_02:You should like you should be satisfied, but that goes back to what I say, like, and that's why I think, you know, as as as dads, as parents, we can't try to to you know, you know, satiate these kids because they're never going to be, there's there's there isn't, there's no, there's no lit, there's no limit to you know what they want and what they desire. So we have to be the ones to set that boundary, you know, and that's that's where it comes in where you got to talk about the financial responsibility and and I think that we could use you know Christmas as a good teacher for that. You know, how to manage you know your expectations and and and your desires and what you want versus the reality of the world and what we you know what we can afford to do. You you you you should have those real conversations with the kids because um, you know, that's how you get spoiled brats and people that grow up and thinking they're supposed to have everything and they don't they don't have that concept because they got everything, you know, during Christmas and it was never told no, and the and the parents went broke trying to provide the best gifts and presents, and it's and it's just a cycle. It's it it happens every year. Like you said, you go into debt every single year trying to get these gifts. Is it really worth it in the end?
SPEAKER_00:Oh man. So uh Jay, so let me ask you now, uh historically, I think that Christmas, when we talk about the gift giving um decorations, uh, cookies and milk, Santa, if you will. Do you think at some point is is should there be a certain age where kids shouldn't have an expectation? It's two parts. A kid shouldn't have an expectation of gifts or a bunch of gifts, and then the second part is when should they start contributing in the gift giving process?
SPEAKER_02:What age? That's a good one. That's a good question. Um, yeah, so I want to remind the listeners that I listen, I'm I'm a new, I'm still new. My son is five, so I haven't even experienced all of this yet. You know what I'm saying? I bought him, I bought like, you know, we I bought him gifts every Christmas, but he wasn't even old enough to really like understand what you know what Christmas is. So I think um, you know, this year, you know, it's really dope. But um, yeah, I think I think that at a proper age, I would say, I'm trying to think, like, when when did I really start doing it? Because because the thing about it is, you know, gifts, we think about you know, monetary gifts, but truthfully, it doesn't have to be, you know, spending money. So the age where you can start giving gifts is, you know, as soon as you're able to um, you know, think of a a decent gift that you know somebody might like. I think maybe, I don't know, maybe like what, like 10, 12, you start kind of participating. Because at that age, you you like you've had some, you got some good Christmases under your belt, right? You starting to hit that adolescent age, you preteen and stuff like that. So I think, you know, you could you could probably save up something, you know, save some cash up and get something nice for mom or dad or you know, some some family members or something like that. That's what I would say.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, I think also, you know, the grandparents play a great part in that because they don't have the same quote unquote obligation than that the parents do. So they can have a little bit more leeway and a little bit more creativity. You know, uh grandma, your granddad, or something like that, you know, they can kind of chip in, like, get this to your mom, get this to your mom. Oh, oh yeah. Yeah, that's good. Uh I I think that's really awesome when, you know, and it may not be the grandparents, it could be the aunts and uncles. And but, you know, it really does have some value um in in a couple of different ways. One, you know, the kids can can give a gift and they can see the reaction of mom and dad, right? Because we're gonna act like they just gave us a million dollars, right? Right. Even though uh they just, you know, colored uh outside the lines on a couple pictures and stuff.
SPEAKER_02:You know, but it's included some macaroni to it.
SPEAKER_00:You know what I mean? Gotta have that, man. Gotta have that. But then also uh they get to see that, you know what, I just got a bike. You know, I just got a uh a train, I just got a drone, a remote car, and I just gave you know and dad, like you said, a macaroni necklace. Right? Wait a minute. Get your weight up, little man, little lady. But but it it does, it gives a a teaching moment of uh of what's valuable. And of course, what's valuable is that it came from the heart, you know, it was heartfelt. And then, you know, there was creative and resourceful. You know, I I think that that's what we need to look at. But what's funny though, Jay, is think about it. Like, what if you gave, you know, let's say Parker's 10 now, right? And let's just say for Christmas, you drew a picture for him. You gave him a picture, man, that you that you drew and colored in, man. Like that's how we have to think about it in terms of you know prioritizing things and and showing value. Um, because we we want our our children to, you know, have some really, really keen ideas and ideals, you know, when it comes to the holidays. And I I really, you know, kind of withdrew from, you know, all these gifts and stuff. I mean, uh, you know, as as the kids gotten older, and I would say probably somewhere in the teens, somewhere in in high school, you know, to where they got jobs and then kind of buy something of their own, or um things like uh uh uh some cash to put in their vehicles, you know what I mean, or be able to just kind of spend some money and do their own shopping. Um I I think you know that's kind of around that age where um you know you can kind of wean off a little bit. Because now, you know, they got jobs and they got access to resources. So it's like, okay, I just you know got you a hundred dollars of of something and and all you did was you know send me a text. Like, come on. Let's let's think about this thing, right? So uh, you know, I think it's still some teachable moments that we have to look at, you know, for our kids. But you know, before we wrap this thing up, Jay, I do want, I think it's very necessary, again, to have some actionable steps kind of going into uh the the new year, because that's what we look at uh when we're talking about, you know, Christmas, Kwanzaa, around that time, man. We we really it is a time of reflection, but it's also a time of preparation. I think that's really important. So let's give them, I don't know, maybe about five or six tips of uh of how to prep for your new year, for your new season, and uh what that could possibly look look like.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, yeah, it's uh it's a great time to do it. You know, uh if if you're listening right now, go ahead and get that notebook out. You know what I'm saying? Because this is this some gems. So uh number one, I would say uh I think the biggest one is just gonna be reflecting. I don't think that we just kind of sit back and and reflect enough because there's always so much stuff going on. We're moving on to the next. So really sit down and reflect. You know, look at you know what was good, what was bad, look at your triumphs, look at some of your downfalls and things like that, and kind of see where you could connect the dots and and bring that, you know, um bring that up going into the into the new year, you know, identifying the habits that you want to leave behind. I know we always talk about the new year's resolution, and some people buy into it, some people don't. But I think at the end of the day, um whatever whatever you set up for yourself is is for you. You don't even have to really listen or or pay attention to what anybody else is doing. Just just just set up something for yourself and see if you can make a commitment to yourself. That's really you know, really what it's about. Um definitely number one, I would say reflect them. Um number two, just identify those those those habits that you don't want to carry on.
SPEAKER_01:Right.
SPEAKER_02:Um you could do some mental decluttering, okay. Right? So what that is, is clearing out old thoughts, grudges, emotional weight that you're holding on to because it's holding you back. Okay, so identify those things. Um, and it it could be it could be hard because some of these things you might haven't you might haven't uh you know put a thought to in a while because you just got it back in the in the in the back of your mind. But bring it forward, you know what I'm saying? Identify it, deal with it so that you don't have to keep you know carrying it on. Um another big one I say this is um a financial reset.
SPEAKER_01:Right?
SPEAKER_02:Financial reset. What that is, is reviewing your spending, right? Look at look go up open open the open the app up and see how you know what what was subtracted, add it up and see if it makes sense, right? So review your spending, review, review your debts. And then of course, you know, set some goals, man. That's that's always a goal. And it's not just for going into a new year. You should constantly be setting and achieving goals, I think, um, all throughout the year. But definitely this is a good time to to write down, pin down some major goals. Maybe you want to make a vision board, maybe you want to, you know, do a daily journal where you write it down three times a day with the you know, the three, three, three method rule and and things like that. Um yeah, but yeah, so financial reset is definitely a good one as well. Um what was that? It was like three of them, three or four.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah. No, that was that was good. I would just add, you know, I would add to that to um handle unfinished business. Like a lot of times people just kind of, okay, it didn't happen in in 2025. So let me try something different. No, there's some unfinished business. If if you have some, you know, some businesses that you started, you know, earlier in the year that may not have done that great. Uh, you still need to scale your business. Uh when we talk about scaling, um you you look at what's been working, what hasn't been working, and you tweak it and make some adjustments. And I think that that is so key. Because that's not only in business, but that's in life as well. Like uh, I think reset is is uh better than restarting, right? Because when you restart, you're you're at the very beginning as if it did not work. But you know, when you reset, you're like, I you know, I'm I'm gonna take a couple of steps in this direction and pivot a little bit and make some things happen that didn't happen before. But I also think that looking at those relationships, Jay, I think looking at those relationships and seeing the value in them, and then some some relationships, man, you you may just have to terminate completely terminate because it hasn't been doing you well, right? It's it's actually been uh to your demise. And so you have to start looking at those relationships and and just understanding that as you continue to evolve, some other folks may not be on that. So you don't want to enable their growth, right? You don't want to do that. So make sure that you really take a look at what's going on around you. What's it saying? If you can't change what's going on around you, change what's going on around you, but you can't change it. So you may have to just kind of change the atmosphere, change the the uh the the platform and and move on out. So I just want to encourage everybody to continue to stay encouraged, even if those things that you started uh didn't have the success that you thought that they would. It doesn't mean that it's still not a great idea, it doesn't mean that there's uh not a community to still serve. You know, you just have to get refocused. And that's what um, you know, elevation, you know, is all about is uh taking those old things, letting them be old, and uh and get to some new new. You know, Jay, uh one of the things I I used to love saying to like my business partners and my close friends that you know would get upset when you know family members would wouldn't support their businesses like they thought, or their their homies or homegirls, or you know, their friends, and they didn't get the support that they thought. You know, my solution is and always will be new people solve old problems. New people solve old problems. And so allow your aunt, your uncle, your cousins, your best friends, allow them to be who they are to you. Right? Let them be family members, let them be friends and things like that. They don't necessarily have to be customers. You want them to be customers, but they don't have to be customers. Allow them to, you know, become on their own. Like you can always introduce it. Okay, thank you for the support. Uh, if you can't support me in that way, then you know the encouragement helps. Uh doing some free things like sharing what I got going on. Like you talk about me anyway. Right, yeah. Talk about my new business for me. Can you do that? Right? If since you're talking and running and bumping your gums is the old thing.
SPEAKER_02:I was about to say facts on it. You talking about me anyway.
SPEAKER_00:You talk about me anyway, man. Throw away my business, throw on what he got going on now, talk about that. Would you? I think that you know it's really some some uh simple resolutions, man, that we kind of get in our own head and we allow people to uh to get in um our head at times, man. So it's a brand new, it's a brand new day. We're going into a brand new season. Uh how you feeling about 2026, Jay? What you got going on in 2026, man?
SPEAKER_02:Yo, Pops, I'm about to sound so cliche right now. Okay. But it's how I feel. 2026 is my year. Okay. And I'm saying it's it's on record, it's recorded. It is. So, you know, y'all can hold y'all can hold me to it, but I'm going so hard this year, man. I got so many plans and ideas, and I've and I feel like, you know, I've I've gotten enough experience, right? You know, because when I when I first got here, and we've kind of cataloged my journey, you know, on this podcast, even um, you know. When I first got here, it was it was so much that's new to me. But I'm not new to it now. You know what I'm saying? It's not new to me. And now I'm honing in on you know what I need to really do for me to take it to the next level and how to execute it. So I'm taking all this knowledge that you gave me, you know, all the different rooms and people and connections that I made. And um, it's it's gonna work for me. It's gonna work for me in 2026. So y'all stay tuned because I'm not just talking. I'm not just talking. Um, yeah, it's gonna be great, though. It's gonna I I'm I'm really looking forward to it. I think it's gonna be really, really major for sure.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, super proud of you, son. You know, we've we've had a great year. We thank you guys for your support, um, not only on the podcast, but we had so many projects, you know, throughout the year. Uh, a lot of them will, you know, be dropping in 2026. But, you know, 2025 has been great, you know, just kind of building our relationship and being able to learn from each other, I think, is absolutely amazing. So we encourage not only the mother-daughters and all that, but as you know, obviously we're father and son. So we want to encourage all the fathers and sons to continue to build that relationship, whether it's brand new or whether it's 15, 20 years uh developed. And, you know, just keep doing that. So we got much love for you, much success moving into the new year. Enjoy today with family, friends, and loved ones. And we have so much respect and uh gratitude for the support. So we're signing out, happy holidays, pops and sun conversations, and as always, your favorite silver fox, Rob Malloy.
SPEAKER_02:Checking out Happy New Year!
